Tuesday, May 24, 2005
Sunday, May 15, 2005
So sorry guys, I've been out quite a long time. I'm actually fine, but damn tired this past few days goin through freshmen orientation at NYP!!! So how was it? It was on the 18th to 20th May. There's OGL(orientation grop leaders) who guide us around the school. They're Samantha, Anthony and Chloe.
The first day of our orientation was kinda boring. It was so borin, they do briefings and speech and all those intro's about our new school that kind of stuff, makes me wanna sleep. And I did took a quick nap in the lecture room. Hehez, luckily no one caught me lah...
And the next day, I have to go for 90 secs of fame. AND DO A maths!!! Like, wat the hell?! Its so pathetic that we have to study on our orientation day itself! About the 90 secs of fame thingy, need to go for auditions. Too bad I was so nervous, my pitching was totally off. Worst still, song selection never clicked with the fellow judges. I noe, my fault. Expected, did'nt get selected. So sorry Samantha you could'nt see me perform for MIT 0506...
Anyway, Third day was the BOMB!!! There's still prepatory Maths in the morning, went for Friday prayers with all the muslim guys in SIT, then head straight to the auditorium. Hehez, I've got new brother man, name's Sharil. Different class, but my senior by a year old. Teased the other malay guys while eating lunch too. Me a bit too outgoing lah...Anyway, the concert was excellent! The crowd went wild, wooo.... after that breaktime, my class very very stingy, took three plates of snacks leh, a lot of them. Hey, my classmates finally get along together! Yeahness... last was the finale and performance from our fellow OGLS. There's Chloe dancing on stage. Go Chloe!!!
Hahakz, tomorrow's a big day. Goin out with my new classmates, hopefully get to noe quite a few of them a lot better. Anyway, MIT 0506 rocks!!! Love my new class man...
Till then, May God bless you, Wassallam.
was rockin' on
Tuesday, May 24, 2005 and they said..
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Thursday, May 12, 2005
Sianz...
Ola, me goin back to blogging once more...Muahaha. Anyway, today I was kinda feeling down actually.Did'nt noe why, even though had a wonderful time at Sentosa yesterday. But my heads been feeling so weird lah, can't describe it. Pendekkan cerita, I was a little bit worried. Dunnoe why the hell I was feeling that way, maybe me having mood swing or what. Hehe, could'nt be routined PMS's right( Hahaha, whatever...)
Although I played soccer with my friends this morning...hmm, it was boring. No Ah yong! No favourite personnel, Melvin!!! The street soccer sucks just now, and we left early! Why?!
Ok, Hidayat now not in the mood, still feeling a little bit stressed out. So think POSITIVE!!! Yeah, orientation's next week! Haha, so now I got to see my new school, like finally. And then, yeah my old friend's gonna call me tonight. Lets say she's just a faraway relative of mine staying abroad, glad she's contacting me once more. Since tomorrow's officially Hari Guru in Malaysia, she's staying late so that we could have a nice chat all night. How cool is that? Kenape eh, maybe she's single right now, hmm...
Maybe talk about Sentosa for tomorrow's entry instead lah. Now just waiting for someone's msg. Then have to call her using my prepaid Digi card i bought at Malaysia(hopefully there's still money in it, haha...). Till then, May God Bless you, Wassallam.
was rockin' on
Sunday, May 15, 2005 and they said..
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Tuesday, May 03, 2005
Why would I bother to be thinking of her now…why would I ever think that I would be forgiven…maybe its because I lied…I lied to a lot of people, my friends…my family…and myself…and I know now that…even as time goes for a standstill…nothing could be change…not a single miracle could even heal a wound so deep inside of me…they left me as though I’ve made a terrible sin…yes I did have made a big one, something that even you find it hard to believe…you wouldn’t understand…how my world revolved…how I feel being so agonized, jaded by these thing called love…a responsibility so heavy for me…to my friends…to my family…and not even a single thing for myself…I don’t even need to be sympathized…just some morale booster from the people around me is all I needed…to carry on living…these world of mine, alone…biarlah ku dihina…dicaci…dipersendakan…atas desakan nafsu…atas kesalahan ku…atas segala perbuatan ku yang dikejikan…ku terimanya dengan sepenuh hati…ku terimanya sebagai balasan daripada Yang Maha Esa…ku redha…ku mengundur diri ku…ku mengalah…I wouldn’t want to tell her…I kept it all to my own…my reasons are never to be spoken of…not even one knew why…but lying to her was what I’ve done…so I did…so hateful she was to me…words do go around…but you forgot my dear…promises don’t …hanya tersirat di dalam hati…hanya bahan umpatan kau terima segalanya…and to think hatiku kan berdamai sekarang…mungkin ku salah…it was just the beginning…of an inevitable relationship…that when totally wrong…because of me…maybe it was too late…maybe its just starting…I can now be a friend…or even your foe…wallahuallam…wassallam…
was rockin' on
Thursday, May 12, 2005 and they said..
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"Siapalah ku ini, untuk memintal buih
Yang memutih, menjadi permaidani
Seperti mana yang tertulis dalam novel cinta...
Juga mustahil bagiku, menggapai bintang di langit
Menjadikan hantaran, syarat untuk milikimu
Semua itu, sungguh aku tak termampu..."
That was what I had in mind this past few weeks. So sorry guys I've been on a very long week hiatus, and did'nt even bother to update my blog. But my blog's been goin through a series of misfortunate events too, its been experiencing problems all these while. And I too was'nt left out, but I dared not say it anymore coz its already over...
Anyway, mother's day coming soon, ku sebagai anak yang sayangkan ibunya seperti mana semua anak-anak mereka sayangkan ibunya juga, tidak kesampaian untuk memberinya sebuah buah tangan kepada mak yang tersayang. And i feel so guilty I could'nt give her one, not becoz I dun have any money, but my mom refused to...
"kalau abang sayang kan mak, jagalah adik mu dengan kasih sayang yang sepenuhnya. Itulah hajat mak, tak usah abang belikan apa-apa pada hari ibu. Tunaikanlah janji-janji mu, dan mak akan restui kasih sayang abang ok..."
Dan kerna itulah, ku tergamak melepaskan seorang insan yang pernah kasihi. Ku bawa diri kerna tidak kesampaian untuk membelah bagi kasih sayang ku. Maafkan lah diri ku kalau ku telah menyimpan semua ini dan membohongi diri mu. I just want you to forget about me, becoz I noe I'm not the guy that you'll be happy with. Dan skarang, biler ku sedar betapa rindu nya diriku pada nya, ku hanya berdoa semoga diri nya bahagia selalu...
And now, I'm just picking up pieces of me back and try to move on. Although, I being to one who refused her in the first place, find it so hard to forget about her. Anyway, school's gonna start school, and I need to buy my own school apparels. Haiz, I've got the money, but did'nt got the time. So why bother, might as well I keep it and pay it for my sis's school transport instead. Insyallah.
Maybe I'll stop here for now, there's no topic I would like to discuss rite now. I'm not in the mood. Till then, May God bless you, Wassallam.
"Slamat tinggal, kekasih ku..."
was rockin' on
Tuesday, May 03, 2005 and they said..
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